


Studying Stones

by midnightbokeh



Category: Frozen (2013)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, F/F, Femslash, fem!Kristanna, fem!Kristoff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-30
Updated: 2014-07-24
Packaged: 2018-01-27 15:13:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,322
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1715132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/midnightbokeh/pseuds/midnightbokeh
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Krista learned long ago that nothing good comes from wanting what you can't have. So of course Anna crashing into her world is a total disaster.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I am high above the tree line

**Author's Note:**

> My offering to the [fem!Kristoff](http://archiveofourown.org/tags/fem!Kristoff) sandbox started by [Counterpunch](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Counterpunch/pseuds/Counterpunch/works?fandom_id=966650).

Morning arrives clear and calm, the mountain slopes awash in coral hues painted bright by the rising sun. Last night’s howling winds, now abated, remain evident only in the form of towering snow drifts piled against the rocks.

_This was a bad idea_ , Krista thinks as she tries to concentrate on the sensation of fresh powder crunching beneath her boots. _A very, very bad idea._

At her back, following in her footsteps, a certain princess has launched breathlessly from one childhood story – “…and they never did get the stains out!” – to another, “Ooh, did I tell you how much Elsa liked ice skating? I was never very good at it, but there’s this pond on the castle grounds…”

There was a reason Krista didn’t take people places, least of all pretty girls (not that she’d been looking at Anna that way, come _on_ ). She still hasn’t forgotten the last time she did, still stings from the memory of finding out how wrong her assumptions could be, how the farmer’s daughter with the doe eyes and vivacious laugh, who showered her with compliments and Sven with sweet-talk, really was interested in little more than the sleigh rides Krista had so willingly given her to Arendelle’s marketplace whenever she passed through the village.

Blinded by infatuation and wishful thinking, spurred on by the naivety of youth, she’d been stupid enough to profess her feelings one day while dropping off that girl at the square. Her stumbling confession was met with chilly indifference and a hasty goodbye. Krista stopped by the farm the following week, apology on her tongue and dread in her chest, only to be chased off by the girl’s shouting father, _“Keep your filth away from here!”_ ringing in her ears.

She avoided girls altogether after that, not trusting herself to behave appropriately and deciding the best approach was none at all.

Which is why her current situation has bad news written all over it – Anna isn’t just any girl, she’s a _princess_. Who is engaged to a _prince_. And whose sister is the _Queen with powerful ice magic_.

“Krista? Hello?”

Oops – said princess must’ve asked her something and Krista has no idea what. She turns around, continuing to walk backwards, and raises an eyebrow at her.

“Huh?” Krista asks.

“Really Krista, you could’ve at least pretended to be listening while I rambled,” Anna says with a huff. Sven pokes his head over her shoulder and wags his antlers side to side in mock reproach.

“Sorry, I was just…” Krista searches for a plausible explanation, fails, and flaps her arms in a broad shrug instead. “You were saying?”

“I said, what would you be doing now if I hadn’t bumped into you at the trading post?”

“Heading south, probably,” she replies. “The winter has to stop somewhere, right? I figured Sven and I’d go down the coast until we found warmer places to sell off our harvest. With weather like this, we could cover ten, fifteen leagues a day, easy.”

“Oh,” says Anna, chin tucked, looking up at Krista through her lashes. “Well, I appreciate you going out of your way to help me find my sister.”

“Don’t mention it.” Krista thinks of her pride and joy smoldering in a heap at the bottom of a chasm. She grimaces. “Really, don’t.”

“Sorry about your sled,” Anna adds as if reading her mind, “and for ruining your plans.” She fidgets with the end of a braid. “I seem to be doing that a lot lately.”

They’ve stopped walking and Anna is starting to look so dejected that Krista feels a twinge of regret over her choice of words. Before she can think better of it, she reaches out and touches Anna’s elbow.

“Hey. Stop that,” Krista says. “You shouldn’t dwell on the past; it just… it weighs you down. Better to focus on what you _can_ do now.”

Anna brightens – her smile like sunshine coming out from behind a cloud, directed so fully and so radiantly at Krista that her heart skips a beat – and declares, “You’re right! That’s the best advice I’ve heard all day!”

Krista rolls her eyes. “That’s the _only_ –” but Anna’s gone already, bounding past her left side in a flurry of woolen purple and blue, Sven kicking up mounds of snow as he scampers after her like an eager puppy.

_Bad idea_ , Krista reminds herself as she turns and follows after them.

 

* * *

  


By nightfall, Krista has changed her mind: this wasn't a bad idea. This was a full blown disaster.

Just when she thinks the day can't get any worse, that nothing could possibly top getting thrown out of Elsa's ice palace, chased by an angry snow golem and falling two hundred feet after having her head dashed against the unrelenting cliffside, it does. It gets much, much worse.

She's brought Anna to the valley, painfully aware of her every shake and shiver, mentally cursing her inability to help in the slightest. _Grand Pabbie will know what to do_ , she tells herself to quell the mounting worry. _He'll fix this._

But Grand Pabbie is sleeping, and the rest of her family has other ideas. Mortifying ideas.

"Krista's home!" they shout, swarming her in droves. They notice Anna hovering back at the edge of the clearing and blink in unison once, twice, "And she's brought a girl!"

Everyone stares at each other for a beat – Anna looks at Krista in confusion, Krista looks at the trolls in horror, the trolls look to and fro between them both with wide-mouthed glee – and then there's an explosion of mass cavorting and hand-waving. "A _GIRL_!"

Krista's adoptive mother pushes her way to the front of the throng. "Of course!" Bulda croons, palms open and outstretched. "Why didn't you tell us sooner that's the way you felt, dearie?"

"What? No! _Pleasestoptalking_ ," Krista yells in alarm.

"Oh, we're not–" Anna attempts.

It's a lost cause. The trolls have started singing about love, ignoring their protests, shoving them into traditional wedding attire and Krista is pretty sure she would rather be at the bottom of the chasm, _on fire_ , than right here at this moment.

And yet.

And yet she looks over at Anna, smiling despite her confusion, positively glowing beneath the aurora borealis and the elemental crystals crowning her head, and Krista has never seen anything more beautiful in her life.

From across the clearing, Anna looks back, locks eyes with her. She must look ridiculous, because Anna bursts into a fit of giggles and claps a mitten over her mouth. Krista feels a tingling jolt that starts in her heart, races through her veins and makes her weak at the knees. She might have fallen down if the trolls weren't already carrying her into an altar in the ground.

"Do you, Anna, take Krista to be your trollfully wedded-"

"Wait, what?"

And then the farce is over as suddenly as it had begun.

The lights in the valley fade, just like the tentative, nameless hope that had started to whisper inside of Krista.

Anna's life is in peril.

Krista looks down at the girl collapsed in her arms, cold seeping through even her thick winter sleeves, and knows what she has to do.

_It's not really giving something up_ , Krista decides, _when it was never yours to begin with._


	2. Sitting cross-legged on the ground

Krista can hardly believe the nightmare has ended. Can hardly believe that after everything that happened, she and Sven were asked to stay here as guests of honor at the castle.

She wakes from the best sleep she's had in recent memory to the sound of birdsong floating through the open window, curtains billowing in a warm breeze. She rises, gets washed up, marvels at the fine weave and detailed trim of the clothing that's been left for her in the wardrobe, then pulls on a freshly pressed pair of trousers, shirt and vest.

None of it feels real.

 _Anna is safe. Anna is alive. Anna got her sister back_ , Krista repeats to herself. It's all that really matters.

She’s not sure what’s expected of her now, after the thaw; yesterday was a blur of activity in town, the royal sisters going about mending property and relations alike, Krista accompanying them at Anna’s insistence, Sven and Olaf in tow. In the end, exhaustion set in and they retired to the castle.

( _“Thank you,”_ the Queen said to her emphatically at the bottom of the spiral staircase, _“we’ll speak more tomorrow.”_ And when Anna said, _“Good night, Krista,”_ and touched her forearm while smiling _that_ smile, she forgot how to respond and only managed a nod before being led away by the head butler.)

All Krista knows is she shouldn’t outstay her welcome, so she puts on her sash and boots and leaves the borrowed sleeping quarters in search of her hosts.

The guest wing of the castle is quiet. It's mid-morning; most of the visiting officials and nobility have gone down to the docks by now, the ships loaded and made ready for sailing. Krista wanders the halls, nearly empty but for a handful of household staff going about their duties, one of whom stops to point her in the right direction. She helps herself to bread and brunost from the breakfast spread she finds laid out for visitors in the ballroom, pockets an apple for Sven, and heads outside to the stables.

Sven is missing from his stall; so is the bag of supplies she left with him the night before. Krista's about to start interrogating the nearest stablehand when a familiar voice draws her back out to the courtyard.

"Olaf?" she calls. "Where is everybody?"

The snowman turns his head from the fountain he’s apparently been conversing with, sees Krista and runs over with a wide smile. 

"Hi, Krista! Isn't it a beautiful day?" Olaf skids to a halt in front of her and clasps his twiggy fingers together. "I saw Anna taking Sven to the marketplace earlier. She wouldn't say why exactly... something about a surprise."

"Oh," says Krista. _A surprise?_ "Okay? Thanks."

"No problem!" Olaf replies cheerily, and off he goes, chasing a butterfly.

Krista continues out the gates in a bemused state. She has to hand it to Olaf, though -- it _is_ a beautiful day. Sunlight glints in a myriad sparkles across the harbor, the waters bluer even than the sky above. The surrounding cliffs, lush once more with verdant foliage, soar up, up over the fjord, as if standing sentinel over the many steep-roofed houses that dot the mountainside.

There’s movement in the corner of her eye and Krista looks toward it just in time to see a lone figure dressed in green barreling down the bridge, copper braids flying.

Anna tackles her with enough force to make her stagger backwards. “Krista!” she squeals while hugging her tight. “You’re finally awake!”

Krista windmills her arms in an attempt to stay balanced. “Anna, what—”

“You’re coming with me!” Anna has reached up and covered Krista’s eyes with a blindfold faster than she can react.

“ _Why?_ ”

“You’ll see! Now come _on_ ,” is all Anna says in reply. She jumps back, grabs Krista by the hand and yanks her into a run, dodging bystanders, going in the direction she just came from. “Come on, come on!”

 **CLANG**.

“Pole,” Krista wheezes. 

“Sorry!” Anna tugs her to the right and stops after a few more steps. “Okay! Okay. Here we are.” She whisks the blindfold off.

Krista blinks at the sudden return of light. Blinks again when she takes in what they’re looking at.

“I owe you a sled.” Anna sounds as pleased with herself as Sven looks; the reindeer saunters up and rests a hoof on its polished wooden bow, a gleaming silver medallion draped over his neck.

Krista’s jaw drops. “Seriously? No. I can’t accept this.”

She’s never been gifted anything before, never had the people in her life who would do such a thing. Anna is bouncing with excitement, plowing over Krista’s objections with a non-stop stream of chatter, something about the Queen naming her Arendelle’s official ice master and deliverer ( _that’s not a thing… is it?_ ), rattling off the sled’s features and qualities. The words wash over Krista, bathe her in a warm glow. A wave of affection swells from somewhere deep inside her chest; she looks at Anna and in her mind’s eye they’re back in the valley, only now there’s no danger looming, no threat of losing her, just Anna, _Anna_ , buoyant and full of life and _here_.

“Do you like it?” Anna asks, eyes wide, an uncharacteristic shyness in her voice.

“Like it? I love it!” Krista lifts her clear off the cobblestones and spins around in a joyous circle. “I could kiss you!”

Krista’s brain catches up to her mouth a split second later. _Oh no. Not again. Not with_ her.

She lets go of Anna like she’s been scalded, pulls back, arms folding low, and bunches her traitorous hands into fists at her waist.

“Not- not that I would,” the words spill out of Krista in a panicked rush when she sees Anna’s smile falter. She feels a cold, heavy pit lodge beneath her sternum. “I mean, that would be..."

“Yeesh, right?” Anna offers with a nervous chuckle.

“Right.” Krista’s answering laugh rings hollow in her ears. There’s an awkward pause, Anna biting her lower lip and Krista staring at the ground. She forces her gaze upward, sees with a start that Anna is studying her face with an indecipherable mix of emotions in her eyes.

Feeling exposed, Krista clears her throat and lifts a hand to rub the back of her neck. "I, uh..."

"I should go," Anna blurts. She retreats a step, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Elsa's setting up an ice rink later today and I should check on her, um, in case she needs anything."

She turns to leave, makes it a few steps, turns back and adds, "But you should definitely come to that! It'll be lots of fun!"

Krista is at a loss for words.

Anna spins around to start off again and nearly collides with the same pole. She grabs hold of it with both hands, swinging around it — "And bring Sven too!" she finishes before slingshotting herself on a trajectory back to the castle. Not a moment later, she's disappeared amidst the crowd.

In a daze, Krista walks over to the sled — it really is a fine piece of craftsmanship — and slumps against its side, mouth dry, shoulders hunched. Sven nudges her.

“Yeah buddy, I know." She looks at him, looks down at her hands. It wouldn’t be the first time her inability to keep her idiot mouth shut has gotten her into trouble. “I know,” she sighs.


	3. When all the forbidden fruit has fallen

Anna considers herself to be rather good at puzzles.

Growing up, she'd amassed quite the collection from Papa's travels -- jigsaw maps from the west, tangrams from the east, cast iron tanglements from the south -- and no shortage of long hours to entertain herself with them on her own. She took pleasure in fitting the pieces together or taking them apart, feeling the shape and texture of each one in her hand, coaxing them stubbornly until a solution emerged.

But of late, one puzzle in particular has her utterly stumped, and it's the walking, talking, ice-hauling enigma that is Krista.

Krista, who risked everything to come back for her through the storm. ( _"She's really moving fast,"_ Olaf had remarked from the window. Anna wonders now if that was the first piece falling into place, or if it had started even earlier.)

Krista, who now seems to be retreating into formality, avoiding time alone with Anna like her life depended on it. (Once, a glimpse of blond hair turning a corner, back turned to her, reminded Anna of how it was _before_ ; her heart thudded heavy with the thought and she pushed it aside, telling herself _it’s not the same, it’s not the same._

Krista, who despite all that, Anna catches on occasion staring at her from down the table in the dining hall, only to quickly avert her gaze when she notices Anna looking back. (For her part, Anna let her attention linger once Krista’s was elsewhere, from the strong curve of her jawline down to the way her fingers grasped at utensils, and felt a flush of heat at the memory of those same hands on her hips — Anna’s eyes went wide at that and she hurried to drink from her glass to mask the redness of her cheeks.)

In short, Anna is confused. And when Anna is confused, she goes looking for answers.

She finds Elsa in her room one evening, reading on the window seat, knees tucked up and pages illuminated by the soft glow of a snowy sphere floating over her shoulder.

"How can you tell if someone's interested in you... _that_ way?" she asks.

Elsa lowers her book and looks at Anna blankly. "You're asking as if I'd know from experience."

"If you had to make a guess," she persists.

"I don't know, they'd probably tell you... is there someone else I need to be worried about now?"

"No!"

"It's not that Andorran prince Felipe from last week's trade conference, is it?" Elsa arches a brow at her. "I mean, he _did_ seem quite taken by you, but-"

"Oh, no. No more princes!" Anna interrupts, raising one hand and crossing her heart with the other. "I've sworn them off. Promise."

"Uh huh. Well, I'm here if you want to talk."

"I know," says Anna. She throws her arms around her sister's neck in a hug. "Thanks, Elsa!"

Elsa hides a grin and goes back to reading, but as Anna turns to leave she notices her glancing thoughtfully in her direction.

The next morning, Anna asks Gerda the same question.

"Traditionally it's the gentleman who asks the lady if she'll accept his courtship," Gerda replies whilst changing Anna's rumpled bed linens. "But I can't imagine anyone who wouldn't be ecstatic to have caught _your_ fancy."

Anna purses her lips as she considers this. "What if they haven't asked?"

"I suppose you could help matters along with a hint or two," says Gerda. She smooths down the lavender coverlet and gives Anna a fond smile. "Sometimes people just need a little nudge, is all."

Hinting and nudging? That doesn't sound too difficult. In fact, Anna's quite confident she can hint and nudge with the best of them.

Anna beams at Gerda before dashing downstairs to start the day, a plan already beginning to form in her mind.

 

* * *

 

Ever since what she's come to refer to in her head as the Sled Incident, Krista's been waiting for the other shoe to drop. When she was summoned to the Queen's study, hours after the citizens of Arendelle had gone home from the ice rink, she fully expected to be upbraided for the impropriety of her words and actions toward Anna that morning. ( _"Please, be seated,"_ Queen Elsa had said, motioning across from her desk. _Here it comes,_ Krista thought and wondered what the standard punishment was for making an inappropriate pass at royalty.)

But instead, much to her astonishment, they spoke of ice. ( _"Anna tells me you're very knowledgeable about the subject."_ There was an encouraging warmth in Her Majesty's eyes that put Krista at ease, and like the opening of floodgates the words began to flow, a cautious trickle at first, growing in breadth and depth until the Queen laughed into her hand at Krista's fervor.) It was the first of many meetings over the days and weeks to come, sometimes just with Queen Elsa, poring over maps and almanacs, and sometimes in the company of advisors and planners.

They discuss ways to improve the efficiency of harvesting throughout the kingdom, chart out paths to untapped lakes high in the mountains she'd discovered in her wanderings, design new methods for packaging and preserving ice for export across long distances, and for the first time in her life Krista is heard, her ideas carrying weight instead of being brushed off as the fanciful notions of a loudmouthed woman.

So Krista settles into a new routine, though not a day passes that she isn't amazed by the fact that Official Ice Master and Deliverer is actually a thing, and this is her life now.

Grateful for the distractions of work, she tries not to think about the very royal, very off-limits Princess Anna.

She is not successful on that front.

This particular evening, she's unwinding (not hiding, definitely not hiding) in the stables, just her and Sven and the horses, plucking at the lute Anna gave her.

"Don't be an idiot, Krista," she sings, "Sven, don't you think that's wise?"

Sven is giving her a decidedly unimpressed look, but she presses on anyway.

_"Yeah, keep to yourself and you won't mess things up, everyone would hate you, if they knew."_

"That's what I thought," Krista remarks. She notes Sven's sullen expression. "What?"

Before Sven can answer, the door bangs open, startling them both from the pile of hay they were lounging on.

"Relax, it's just me!" Anna announces as she sweeps in, eyes bright with happiness. She takes one look at Krista and flops down next to her on the hay. "I looked everywhere for you! Guess I should've checked here first, huh?"

Krista attempts to slow the heartbeat pounding in her ears. She grips the instrument in her hands tighter. "What are you doing here?" she asks.

"Talking with you!" Anna jostles her side with an elbow. "I never see you anymore. How was your trip?"

Krista releases the breath she didn't know she'd been holding. "Good," she answers. "We finished putting up markers for the new trail. Gonna be an easy route when it's done."

"I'm so glad you like being here," Anna says, leaning slightly against her shoulder. She pulls back after a second and looks up at Krista’s face, a hand on her forearm. "You do like it here, don't you?"

"Of course I do," Krista says. She means it. She just wishes Anna wasn't so _close_ \-- it's hard to think clearly with her sitting right there, looking at and touching Krista like that, lamplight illuminating her freckled skin with a warm luster.

"That's a relief." Anna's smile could melt rivers. "I mean I did kind of spring the whole thing on you without asking, the 'Ice Master and Deliverer' position was Elsa's idea, though, but anyway I probably should've checked with you first, you know, just in case you had other plans-"

"Anna," she stops her. "Don't worry about it. I'm happy here." _With you_ , the idiot inside of her adds. Krista mentally kicks herself and looks straight ahead.

With a contented sigh, Anna settles back against Krista. “Good. It must be very different from what you’re used to, but this is the only home I know. And when the gates closed, I never… you’re the first real friend I’ve ever made, Krista.” There’s a new softness in Anna’s voice. “I really like having you around.”

Krista hears a rustle of fabric on dried grass and suddenly Anna's planting a kiss on her cheek. It happens so quick -- there one moment, gone the next -- that Krista almost thinks she'd imagined it, except the butterflies that have taken up residence in her stomach say otherwise. She turns toward Anna in stunned silence.

Anna wants a friend; Krista can't be one. Not like this.

The impossibility of the situation strikes her as she watches Anna's smile become uncertain, and Krista curses her own inability to control her feelings. Keeping up this charade would be a betrayal of Anna's trust.

"I'm sorry." Krista lays down the lute and stands. "I can't."

She slips out the door and within moments is striding (not running, definitely not running) toward the castle, trying not to think of the hurt look on Anna's face as she left her there in the stall.

 

* * *

 

It's late at night when Olaf wanders into Elsa's study.

"Huh, I guess I was right the first time."

"Hmm?" Elsa doesn't look up from the missive she's drafting.

"Krista must really love Anna after all, because I just saw her in the courtyard and she's getting ready to leave again and never come back."

Elsa's quill halts mid-word. She stares at Olaf sharply. "Wait, what?"

"I said, Krista must-"

"No no," Elsa cuts him off. She's already on her feet. "I mean, did they — how — you’d better tell me everything you know, Olaf. From the beginning."

He does.


	4. That's when I'm gonna come down

Not for the first time, Krista is having an argument with Sven.

“We’re leaving tonight and that’s final,” she says, wishing she felt as much conviction as her voice carried. “It’s better that way.”

_“But you didn’t say goodbye.”_

“I don’t- I’m no good at those.” Krista’s throat feels raw, constricted. She tightens Sven’s tack using perhaps a little more force than strictly necessary. “You know that, buddy.”

Sven snuffles and shakes his head. _“You’ll get in trouble for abandoning your duties.”_

Krista glances over her shoulder at the sled outside the stables, clean and polished as the day she first received it (she’d made sure of that), silver Ice Master’s medallion draped over its bow, then looks back to Sven. “Where we’re going, no one’s gonna know who we are.”

"Are you sure you want to do that?"

It is one of two voices Krista most dreads hearing at this moment, and she cringes involuntarily as she turns around. “I, uh…”

Queen Elsa is watching her with cool regard from where she stands next to the chapel, posture straight and poised as ever. How had she gotten there so quietly? Krista never even heard the castle doors open and shut, and she had been certain everyone was inside before attempting to leave at this late hour.

"Walk with me?"

Krista’s eyes widen. “Okay, I mean yes, just-” she turns to Sven, “Wait here.”

They cross the courtyard and pass under the archway opposite the stables, descending eroded and moss-tinged steps to the rocky shoreline. It’s a mild summer night; a warm breeze rolls inland over dark waters that ripple gently, small waves tipped white with reflected moonlight.

"This is where it happened, you know," Elsa says.

No further elaboration is needed for Krista to grasp what the Queen is referring to; she’s heard the story countless times, first from Anna, then told and re-told by townsfolk around market stalls, in taverns, at the docks, over the past several weeks.

_"I chased after her, but—"_

_"—went right over the water like it was nothin’!"_

_"Froze the fjord solid—"_

_"—surprised there wasn’t more damage to the ships…"_

_"Abdicated—"_

_"—couldn’t handle—"_

_"But she came back, didn’t she?"_

And like a punch to the gut, Krista understands why she’s been brought here of all places. She thought _she_ had problems? Her problems now seem trite — ridiculous — compared to what Elsa had to go through. A mixture of shame and embarrassment roils in her chest at the irresponsibility of what she had been about to do.

"I’m sorry," she blurts. "I shouldn’t have… I panicked."

They’ve stopped walking, looking out over the water, and Elsa turns her head toward Krista with a questioning gaze.

Krista takes a deep breath and squares her shoulders. “I’ll do it properly,” she says. “Tender an official resignation, help find a replacement, tie up loose ends—”

"Wait, stop." Elsa gestures with both hands, palms out. "That’s not why I— look. What happened earlier tonight?"

Krista snaps her mouth shut in surprise.

"Did you and Anna have a fight?"

"No! Nothing like that, we were just talking, and…" Krista trails off, losing her battle against a rising panic that manifests in a cold sweat and hammering pulse.

"But you’re leaving because of her, right?"

How much does she know? Krista is _so_ dead. “Your Majesty—”

"Please, just Elsa. I’m speaking not as a queen, but as Anna’s sister right now."

 _Oh, great,_ Krista thinks. _Because that’s **much** better._ She wonders what it’s like to be turned into a block of ice and dropped to the bottom of the fjord. Out loud, she says, “Elsa, I don’t know if I can explain…” _Please don’t make me explain._ “It’s not proper. Really, really not...”

Elsa studies Krista’s face in silence, her own expression solemn, maybe even a little sad. “It’s exhausting, isn’t it?” she says at last.

Krista blinks. “What?”

"Hiding a part of yourself all the time." Elsa shifts her attention to the waves lapping against the rocks, hands clasped loosely together in front. "Fearing how others will react. Thinking everything you’ve worked so hard to build can come crashing down at any moment."

There’s a rushing sound in Krista’s ears, like she’s in freefall. “You know?”

"Olaf filled me in a little. And, I’ve seen the way you and Anna look at each other. It wasn’t hard to put two and two together."

Krista is pretty sure she’s gaping; words have fled her mind.

"Have you talked with Anna about it?" Elsa’s looking at her again, head tilted.

She shakes her head.

"I’m not telling you what to do, but just… talk with her at least one more time, and then decide." Elsa glances down at her hands before continuing, "Anna’s had enough people in her life keep secrets from her. She deserves better than that, don’t you agree?"

Krista starts to nod, then somehow remembers how to speak again and manages a choked, “Okay. I will.”

"I appreciate it," Elsa says. "Good night, Krista."

Elsa turns to start back up the stairs, pauses, and adds over her shoulder, “I’m glad I caught you before you ran off. Anna would’ve gone after you and from what I’ve heard, I wouldn’t be nearly as good at keeping her alive in the wilderness as you are.”

Was that a _joke_? Krista stares disbelievingly at the castle long after Elsa has disappeared through its arched entryway.

 

* * *

 

Anna is up before the sun, too restless to stay put, unable to stand reliving the events of last night in her mind for another minute longer. (She hadn’t really slept, between tossing and turning in bed for hours, and Elsa opening the door at god-knows-what-time; _"Elsa? What is it?"_ she’d asked, a muffled lump burrowed under bunched up bedsheets. _"Are you okay?"_ said her sister. _"Yeah, I’m okay. Why wouldn’t I be okay?"_ Quiet footsteps drew nearer, then stopped.  _"Just checking. I love you, Anna."_ Anna poked her head out at that and gave a bleary-eyed smile. _"Love you too."_ Elsa smiled back, said,  _"I’ll see you in the morning,"_ and left Anna even more wide awake than before.)

She walks to her desk and scribbles a note, folding it in half once the ink dries.

The trek from her room to the guest wing feels longer in the pre-dawn hours than during the day. It gives her time to think. She starts with what she knows for sure: Anna likes Krista, _that way_. The knowledge of it, Anna’s ability to fall for women as equally as men, is like a door she never noticed earlier, like she just turned around one day and there it was.

What she doesn’t know is far more vexing: does Krista feel the same way about Anna? Could she? Anna had thought there was a chance, but last night sure proved her wrong.

She stops in front of Krista’s door. Did she already blow it? What if Krista wanted nothing to do with her anymore? She’d take it back if she could, forget about the whole stupid thing, if Krista only wanted to be friends. Anna could live with that. She would. She just needed a chance to _explain_ …

Anna fidgets with the note in her hands, biting her lower lip, and then crouches to slide it under the door before scampering back upstairs.

 

* * *

 

Krista finds her in the library after breakfast.

"You wanted to see me?"

Anna jumps up from the couch where she’d been trying (and failing) to read, book abandoned amidst the cushions. “You came!” She starts toward her, but pulls up short when she sees the wariness in Krista’s face, the stiffness of her stance. “I mean, hi.”

"I’ll take that as a yes." Krista flashes a half-hearted grin and stuffs the slip of paper into her pocket.

A weighty silence falls between them as they alternate between looking at each other and various fixtures in the room. Anna is the first to break it.

"I’m sorry about last night," she says to bookcase behind Krista’s head.

“ _You’re_ sorry?”

"I shouldn’t have put you on the spot like that, it was inconsiderate, and made you uncomfortable, which was _so_ not what I was going for.” Anna is aware she’s rambling, but presses on stubbornly, pacing in front of the fireplace. “I got so caught up in trying to figure things out when I should’ve just asked you…” She turns around and makes herself look at Krista now. “Did you know you’re _really_ hard to read?”

"It’s a survival skill," Krista says, deflecting.

Anna takes a step closer, and another when Krista doesn’t move away. “Can I ask you a question?”

"Go ahead."

"Could you ever be interested in someone—" Anna wrings one of her hands with the other, "—someone like me?" She grimaces at how small her voice sounds, and eyes Krista sidelong.

Krista, for her part, appears dumbfounded. “You would want that?”

"Only if _you_ did! It’s fine if you’re not, just forget I asked, and things can go back to the way they were—”

"I am."

"—and I hope we can still be friends, because I really meant what I said about, wait, what?"

Krista has reached a hand out as if to touch her, stopping mid-air.

Anna looks at the hand, then at Krista’s face, then back at the hand, and, making a decision, grasps it with her own. Krista’s skin is warm, roughened with calluses, and her eyes grow wide when Anna entwines their fingers and swings their arms down to the side.

"Anna."

She’s never heard her name said like that until now, ragged around the edges, in a voice low and cracked with longing. Her insides flutter; they’re standing so close to each other, close enough to…

Acting on an impulse, Anna rises up on her toes and presses her lips to Krista’s.

Everything goes still.

So still that Anna starts to wonder if she did something wrong again, her heart rate quickening at the thought, and she almost pulls away when suddenly there’s a hand on her waist, strong fingers clasping the small of her back, and a tiny squeak escapes Anna’s throat because Krista is returning her kiss, soft and hesitant, and Anna feels like she’s _floating_.

When they part, Anna’s other hand has found its way to the front of Krista’s shirt. She flattens her palm and looks up into eyes full of more tenderness than she’s ever seen there before; it ignites a spreading warmth in her chest, causing her breath to catch.

A new thought enters Anna’s head as she becomes aware of the room they’re standing in and what just happened. She nearly knocks Krista off balance with a fierce hug, grinning into her shoulder.

Anna knows what she has to do.

She takes both of Krista’s hands, squeezes them and says, “Come with me.”

"Huh?"

"Come on!" Anna practically drags Krista out into the hallway. "There’s something I need to show you."

 

* * *

 

Krista is sure she’s dreaming. This _can’t_ actually be happening.

She allows herself to be led around on the strangest castle tour in the history of castle tours, listening in a daze to Anna’s animated chatter. There’s the ballroom, then the gardens, then for some reason they’re clambering over balconies and rooftops. The hours blur, and Anna takes her to the clock-tower, and the lighthouse, and finally on the rough-hewn mountain path winding up to Arendelle’s waterfalls.

"Anna," she says, laughing and out of breath. "Wait up."

Arms outstretched, Anna spins on the stone ledge, framed by twin streams of falling water, afternoon sunlight making her hair shine like burnished copper. “Isn’t it wonderful?”

"It’s beautiful," Krista agrees. _You’re beautiful._

Anna pulls her out from the shaded overhang of the mountainside. She’s smiling from ear to ear. “This is amazing.”

"So, what now?"

Joy radiates from Anna as she throws her arms over Krista’s shoulders and kisses her without preamble. Krista tingles all over and feels her knees start to give; instinctively, she grabs hold of Anna’s hips to steady herself, sliding one hand up her back when the kiss deepens.

They come up for air at the same time. Anna leans backward in Krista’s hold and giggles. “I’ve wanted to do that for a long, _long_ time,” she says.

"Was it how you imagined it would be?"

Anna laces her fingers behind Krista’s neck. “It was even better.”

Doubt still lurks at the edges of Krista’s mind. “But Anna,” she says. “You’re a princess, and—”

"Just because I’m a princess doesn’t mean I can’t choose who I want to be with." That determined look is on her face again, the one Krista realizes is a large part of her inability to let Anna go. "We’ll figure it out, make it work somehow."

"And your sister?"

"I think Elsa knows." Mirth shines in Anna’s eyes. "And won’t mind. You’re not a prince, so you’ve got that going for you at least."

Krista huffs a laugh. “I guess that’s true.”

Maybe it’s crazy, and maybe reality can’t possibly let it be, but for now, Krista is done running from herself. They're going to try and make it work, and that's more than enough reason to stay. She leans into Anna’s embrace, feeling years of tension ebb away with every heartbeat. 

Maybe this wasn’t such a bad idea after all.


End file.
